~decision and time~

time proved everything.. decision made.. an offer to cont work on it but turning down one as well.. i dun think i can cope so much.. i believes i need more own sweet time to rest.. during the drill/march at taman jaya.. i realized many things.. been a long time since last fever.. but i got it this monday.. totally dead on bed when i was doin the price tag layout.. worst i din realize i fell asleep.. next i awake... i'm so damn hooottt.. thx to the day b4 hand which i were to stand under hot sun n run up n down.. then lunch, test car and night dinner too... i dunno if i shud say life is indeed a rollercoaster.. was so devastating getting to know RONAN strayed with an ugly ballerina backstage bitch.. ronan why? why? haihz...

more stuff i got to know as well but mayb i shud not get excited over it.. watever!!... oh car is back to normal... weee~~ was terrible experience to drive when ur 1st n 2nd gear got prob to change @_@... emotionally was pretty weak last 2 days, headache attacked.. ouch.. heartache too attack *double ouch*, hp-ache, car-ache n money-ache.. lalala~~

oh done ahleng's poster.. sorry for not perfect-ing the poster cos miss IB time kinda messed up last few days... arrghh.. n thx for liking it too.. all the best to u n ur frens

catch them at taylors college lakeside campus tomorrow aka 27th May 2010..

bye.. i need to sleep.. headache coming... byez
pudarrrr n fadeeeee

~thank you~

a picture to represents my mood now..

coughing like an old woman.. to the extend my lefty starts to feel the pain.. thank you very much mr cough n miss sorethroat to paint my day in such interesting manner.. things will always be said and done.. but what if it is said and left undone.. thank you so much for saying so much but no thanks for not doing everything you have once said.. i came across a fren's blog which she said something very brave and yes i salute to u pp.. its on ur latest post..

something to look forward would be 3rd day of cny.. as for the 4th day.. i'm still very unsure if i could or should i go for it.. and yes.. really misses home right now.. the awful feeling of not having love wen i'm now a sick cat.. roaarrr..

~nostalgia~

hello all.. its my bday today.. wish me if u havent do so.. lol.. abit of nostalgic n emo.. i know i'm not suppose to feel so.. but i just could not control it.. right now.. abit of emo..n happy too as i c many still remembers me.. touched with et's homebaked cake thou she was really busy working.. but once again.. i feel as thou i'm fooled again for certain stuff.. bday eve too was not a so great one as i had some argument with mom, thou dad supported me but i just dun like the stone cold feelings.. ok.. mom n i ok back after a while..

fears are circulating my thoughts.. not fear of getting old.. but fear of being redundant.. fear of loneliness too.. its been a while since i talk bout wat i feel in my blog.. i meant my emo-ness.. but i really do.. i want to write watever i like.. watever i feel to.. the feeling of being a kite.. being pull and release.. this is 2nd time where i feel this way..

*a gift from some of them*

think back.. one of my happiest bday was back in 2003.. full of clueless suprises.. mayb i was just too naive.. perhaps my yr started way too perfect.. soon i joined YE which day by day, all i hv to do was to fight for our rights.. fight with ms chee.. almost gotten 24demerits.. who really understand me.. no one else cos u r not standing on my shoe.. end of the yr.. good n bad things happened too.. from winning ye 1st runner up.. to losing in apd.. from 1st class to 2nd class.. from best ps to losing glory in a very unacceptable excuse by those asshole.. being a ps was hard to bare with.. problems seems to stick to me as if v were opposite pole.. so magnetive... abit thxful to have some1 back then to back me up.. if u happen to read tis.. thx for being there for me at any hour of the day or night thou v ended up in a quite ugly situation..

if anyone could send me "fool again" by westlife.. cos right now.. i feel so much like that song... believing something which seems to be impossible.. its like i'm trying to reach a star when my feet are stepping on the ground called the EARTH.. thx but no thx for what u've tried to do..

i'm grateful to hv family to stand for me n celeb my bday, happy to get wishessss in fb which flooded my wall.. plurk too cannot be ignore.. sms n phone calls.. but somehow when there's a thorn lied beneath my skin.. its hard for me to act i'm so damn happy...

anyway.. this is just today.. tomoro i'll b back again.. happily walking around,, cos i made myself a promise.. not to b emo continuously more than 24hours.. haha.. mood gotten better after i blabbers out wat i feel..

**thx for all the wishes..
**thx sis for the oreo cheese cake n car for tomoro..
**i'm pampering meself with 2 big gifts for myself end of this month..
**counting down for my getaway.. woot*
**yeah happy back.. ahahaha